Baby Video

So, this one is about 7 months over due, but here ya go.

Audio version of the solo

For those who can't get the video to work, here's an audio version. Just right click on the link and choose "save target...", then you should be able to play it with Windows media player. At least, that's how it should work, but then again, when you're dealing with the web, you never know.

The Solo

Many More Photos

Ok, I've finally given up trying to reinvent the wheel. It turns out while I was trying to carve my wheels out of stone, other were building Lamborgini's and Moon Rovers. So I've given in and am exploiting the offerings of other. Here's the latest cool thing I've found, it lets me share all kinds of pictures while helping me keep them organized. I've put a few up, so go take a look!

Click Here

A Solo

Ok, finally figured out a way to do this. It's a little fuzzy and we didn't use the tripod when we taped it, so it's really shaky. But the sound is good.

So, this is our eldest's solo that she did the other night at the fall concert. She did it again at a contest and is also going to do it at All-State. I think it's really good. What do you think?


Thanks!

Another stupid thing, last one for a while, I promise

From the people who brought you the nerd test, just to prove that we can find creative ways to waste our time.

The results of proper upbringing

Ok, in our ongoing quest to understand our nerdiness, here are the results of our three oldest on the nerd test.

Cheni

Tasha

Derek

As you can see, while I may have rubbed of on them a little, they take after their mother.

Thank! You! LORD!

Proof that opposites attract

As you can see on our menu bar to the left, I am a NERD GOD, which basically means I have no life and more wasted brain space than I know what to do with. My lovely wife, on the other hand, scored thusly:



Which basically means she has real friends and utilizes her brain power for more worthy causes, like caring for people and doing something constructive.

Depression - please understand

Ok, so I may not have the debilitating, crippling kind of clinical depression that other people have. My disease, as of yet, has not rendered me non-functional like others, but that doesn't mean I don't struggle, that doesn't mean that I don't suffer. If one more person tells me that I need to have more faith, that I need to just look at a sunset or think happy thoughts, I'm going to have to kill them.

I wish there were another word to differentiate the medical condition from the emotional state. Being sad because your dog died is not depression. Being stressed because you lost your job is not depression. Losing your money in a bad stock market trade is not depression. Now, all these things are bad and mess you up, but please, understand, the medical condition we call depression is NOT caused by something that happened to you externally, though external factors can trigger an "episode" of the medical condition.

Clinical depression is like... well, I can not really explain it. The closest I can come to describing it is like the emotional equivalent of standing on the edge of a very deep hole. You're standing there, looking down and all you see is blackness. You're frozen, afraid to move because you'll fall into the hole and you'll just keep falling and falling. It's like listening to a sad song, one of those you might hear on the country station about three wooden crosses or something like that, one of those that makes everyone cry. Anyway, you're listening and you feel the tears starting to come, but you're afraid to give in and cry because once you start crying you won't be able to stop. You're afraid that if you give in to the sadness it will consume you.

So what am I doing about it? Well, not really anything. Sometimes it does get to the point that I need to get on meds. I know some people need to be taking Prozac or something else all their life, but I don't like the side effects so I try to do without them. Maybe that's dangerous, but I feel that is what is best for now. I have learned to recognize the "episodes" and know that it is just the effects of my disease and not something I need to act on. Also, my wife has learned to see them as well and helps me "disconnect" before it gets worse.

Please understand, it's not a character flaw, it's not a lack of faith or something to just get over, it's a condition, like male pattern baldness or the shape of your ears. Don't tell me to think happy thoughts, don't tell me to just look at a beautiful sunset or to pray more. If you see me getting bad, help me by not helping me. Tell me you think I'm having a bad day. Whatever you do don't tell me to light up.

I will have to punch you in the mouth.

Like Llamas?

The Llama Song

This is the wierdest thing I've seen. Click play if you dare!

This is how to do it.

I found this article that more than anything I have ever seen shows how we, as Christians, should be. In a world that wants to laugh and point at us and tell us that we're all backwards and crazy, these people are the first ones I've seen in a long time that are doing it right.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15174741/

The article states "Dozens of Amish neighbors came out Saturday to mourn the quiet milkman who killed five of their young girls and wounded five more in a brief, unfathomable rampage."

It goes on to say "About half of perhaps 75 mourners on hand were Amish."

Could you do it? Could you go to the funeral of the man who killed your children? I don't know if I could.

But that's what's missing in the Christian community today, deep, honest, true FORGIVENESS.

All the world sees is "we're right they're wrong", to make matters worse, equal air time is given to the freaks of our culture - like the group from Kansas who goes around to funerals of soldiers carrying signs saying "God hates F***" - and we all get painted with the same brush.

Worse yet, we fight amongst ourselves - "my chuch is better than your church", "my church is the only REAL church", "don't read THAT translation, it's perverted". All the while we're missing the point. It's not 'what WOULD Jesus do', it's supposed to be 'what DID Jesus do'. He died, and as he was dying he said "forgive them...."

So, here we have this quiet group of people, - people who will never see this blog, by the way because they really don't care, - who very simply, very quietly did the right thing. Not for the media attention, not for political gain, just because it was the right thing to do.

If they can forgive that man, and do it with open arms and hearts, then what is our problem? What is my problem?

In Memoriam

Angel

It's been a week and I've been debating whether I should even post this or not.

Our dog died suddenly sometime during the night on October 1st.

Now, if you're not a dog person, or if your dog lives outside on a chain or under your porch and you don't really notice when it's gone, then you don't understand and you can stop reading right now.

But if you are a dog person, if your dog has a bed and it's own toys and sits at your feet when you're at the dinner table then you get it.

Angel was my wife's dog. That's not how we intended it to be, but it just kind of happened. That dog followed her everywhere, even to the bathroom. Oh, she played with the kids too, and even me sometimes, but Anna was Angel's "alpha" and by far her master.

We don't really know what happened. Angel was 8 years old, so not super old, but she got pregnant. We can debate the benefits of spaying later, but it was getting close to the time for the puppies. Not super close, we figured we had a couple of weeks. But Angel had taken to hiding under the bed and not coming out even if called.

The night it happened we had to move the matress to get her out. She couldn't, or wouldn't, walk. We set her by her food dishes, and tried to call the vet. Being the weekend, though, we didn't get a response and thought we'd be ok until Monday.

The best we can figure is that the puppies were getting too big too fast. While we won't ever know for sure, we think one of them shifted and pushed too hard against her heart and lungs.

We had her cremated and placed in a keepsake box. We haven't quite decided what to do with it.

Everyone is still kind of in shock. The kids are all reacting in different ways. We keep saying we should do a funeral or something, just for closure, but we're not sure how to go about it.

self portrait

What do you think? I think I look GOOD!