Only the good....

Dearly Beloved; we are gathered here today to say goodbye to a faithful companion. Dude, or as he was known to his counterparts "192.168.1.123". Was only 5 years old, but like a shooting star burned the brightest (literally) at the end of his short life.
	Purchased in 2003 as a management workmate, Dude began his life running spreadsheets. After several hundred thousand computations, he also spent some time traveling, making approximately 6 or 7 trips to the Denver area for meetings.
The computations and miles took a toll on Dude. During his last year in management, he took a fall, resulting in severely broken hinges. His warranty expired and replacement parts unavailable, Dude was declared obsolete by his makers and his hinges were replaced with brightly colored duct tape and a bungee cord. As you can see his back was also cracked and was held together with bumper stickers. (Never losing his sense of humor, however, he also allowed himself to wear an Apple logo.)
	Later, he began to suffer energy problems. His lifeline, or power cord as some call it, shorted out. Many attempts were made to splice it, but in the end it was splinted and had to be kept immoble - forcing dude to end his life of mobility and submit himself to the same lifestyle as a desktop.
When his management partner became ill, Dude was a constant bed side companion, often sharing games and movies. However, the load on Dude's memory became too great and soon he could only provide email and basic Internet services. (With the help of a USB network connector which eventually also had to be splinted and immobilized to maintain contact.)
	In one final brave attempt to be useful, Dude's hard drive was cleaned and his registry database restored to a new-like condition. For a time he could again share movies and games. But in the end it proved too much and as his friend was attempting to watch Arnold Scharzenegger's "Eraser", Dude's hard drive crashed for the last time and the blue screen of death proved fatal.
Yes, Dude was loved. His memory will live on, (probably sold on eBay with any other salvagable parts), and his loyalty will never be forgotten (because of the burn mark on the night stand where the flames shot out when the hard drive blew.) Good-bye, Dude, you'll be missed. (At least until Dell's next sale and I can afford to replace you.)